Midlands Psychological Associates

  • The term “unacceptable” has become popular among parents in recent years. I find the word unacceptable. Let me explain. The term “unacceptable” does not assist children in understanding their difficult behavior and ultimately adjusting such behavior. Furthermore this word and several other such words are harmful to the children who…

  • A patient I have seen in my office off and on for a number of years told me of a disturbing experience he had had on Christmas. I diagnosed his problem. He had a love problem. I see a lot of people with love problems. And I am not talking…

  • As I continue to move onward in my early 70’s I realize more and more how much I don’t know or don’t understand. It seems the natural humbling experience of growing older. Beliefs and assurances now come rarely, and sometimes not at all. Life was so much easier when I…

  • There is a very common phenomenon among the children that I see in my office. I call it the “4-8-12” phenomenon although I also call it the “5-7-9” phenomenon and other variations depending on how old the child is. However, these number can be multiplied in many ways as I…

  • There is a relatively new body of thinking and research in psychology that examines the phenomenon of intuition. Intuition is commonly expressed as “gut feeling”. Previously, gut-feelings and the like have been seen with some derision because the thinking was that decisions were made with some combination of thinking and…

  • I just spent the weekend with my grandchildren: Alexis, three and a half, and her brother, Gavin, 9. The negative rules of our house are: no TV, no electronics, and no snacks. The positive rules of the house are: play table games a lot, talk a lot, read a lot,…

  • Water. So simple. So necessary. So easily neglected. I will never take water for granted again. It has been a blessing (recently) and a curse (in the past). It started about six months ago. More accurately, it started several years ago. Much more accurately, it started 15 years ago. But…

  • We have too much mothering in this country. Mothering of all kinds including biological mothers, fathers and others who for one necessary reason or another act as “mothers” to their children, government providing a kind of mothering too people who act like children, single mothers who have no choice but to…

  • “I don’t have any friends,” he said. Jack went on: “I don’t know what to do about this. How do you go about finding friends when you’re 50? I had a lot of friends when I was a kid; I had a few friends in high school; I met one…

  • I have been musing about the business of loving and liking. More accurately, I have been thinking about such matters for many years, certainly as most people have thought about these important elements of life. Deb and I have dealt with so many couples over so many years that it…