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I am somewhat in the testing business. No, I don’t test for Lyme disease or cancer or most things that are medical in nature even though most physical and medical ailments have an important psychological origin. In fact, I actually do a fair amount of testing in psychological matters, sometimes…
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The Basic Anxiety in All Men
Since my practice is composed of entirely men, I frequently hear similar things from these men, and surprisingly from men of very different ages. I have come to believe that the central ingredient that men where when they get distress in some way is some form of anxiety. I will…
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The Paradoxes of Life
A math teacher once told me that there are two interesting things about math and science: (1) “Everything interesting happens at the boundaries,” he said, and (2) “To really understand math and science, you have to grasp the centrality of paradox.” How true he was. The whole idea of boundaries…
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Resolution of Trauma
Not long ago I wrote a blog entitled “the only mental health diagnosis” identifying it as trauma-related, and hence PTSD. This remains my opinion of the plethora of diagnoses that are so popular these days. As I previously noted, people simply want to make sense of ails them, whether their…
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I’d Rather Die
You’ve heard people say something like, “I’d rather die than…” followed by something that they abhorred. Maybe, they hate tomatoes and would “rather die” than eat them, which would be true of my grandson. Or maybe, the person would find it abhorrent to own a green car or watch a…
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The Centrality of Disappointment
One of the most important terms to use daily is “disappointment.” Think about it: how many times during a single day are you actually disappointed. If you’re careful to note your feelings and thoughts, you will notice that disappointment is an experience that occurs several times a day. I want…
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Looking for Magic
Everybody loves magic. I always admire someone who is skilled at doing magic, whether someone who is professional on a stage like a colleague of mine (Dr. Dan Feaster), or someone who is just good at some card trick. I always enjoy doing some kind of simple magic with young…
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The Things That We Love
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We all love different things. Our most recent book, What’s Your Temperament, discusses how our temperaments determine what we like, and more importantly, what we love. We made a distinct point that one of the defining characteristics that we have is our temperament, and implicit in each temperament is a…
